Calculating calories was killing me. Is there anything more boring than how many calories in chicken or how many calories in pizza? Don’t get me started on grams!

I did a lot of looking around. I tried a few things to see if they worked. At first I did not have any luck. My weight did not go down and stay down. Even when I eat less calories per day.

As it turned out, what works best for me was right here on the Internet. I found some good advice from a diet expert who understands how we really feel and really act.

What he wrote made sense to me so I gave it a try. Just like I did with what others told me before. But his advice worked better for me because it let me give in to some of my cravings. Like desserts.

I just never have been good at quitting “cold turkey.” That is supposed to help you end your cravings. It only makes me think about food more. I know there are others like me.

I think you ought to give his plan a try. It might work for you too. You’ve got nothing to lose but some fat.

There are only 9 calories in a gram of fat. That sounds much better.

I’m really going to have to learn more about how to cut calories. There’s no way I am going to carry around a calories chart. So I guess I am going to have to become a good calorie estimator.

There are lots of calories in fast food. There are lots of calories in desserts because there are lots of calories in sugar. It seems there are lots of calories in anything that tastes good.

I wonder if there are lots of Chinese food calories. I like Chinese food, but I don’t want to look like a Buddha statue. It has to be better than the calories in pizza. My body fat weight always gets bigger when I eat a lot of pizza.

The stuff I read says there are fat calories, carbohydrate calories and protein calories. Fat has more than twice as many calories as carbohydrates or protein. That makes no sense. To me a calorie is a calorie.

I did learn that fat-free foods can still be high in calories. That is because they can be high in sugar.

There are facts about saturated fat, hydrogenated fat and monounsaturated fat. Those facts are really boring.

I found one diet plan that sounds like it might work for me. I will let you know.

I was a good calorie counter. I knew calorie content, whether it was the calories in chicken, calories in sugar or whatever.

My method was simple – reduce calories, lose weight. There were lots of calories in a pound of fat and I could lose both.

However, now even I must admit that my fat is sticking around. Around the wrong places. My old dieting methods no longer work. I can still count calories, but my body doesn’t care.

The man in my life is not looking at me the way he used to. Come to think of it, neither is my lecherous neighbor. Today I declare that this is going to change.